Missed you. Again.

We did it! We got married! 

You would have loved it, it was a heck of a party. Our own vows, doggy attendant, too much dancing, our drinks budget came and went three times.

Also I kind of freaked out. I really needed you there. I lost my cool, the hour before the wedding and for about the hour after I was borderline manic.

I didn’t make a speech, Léon did. Then they chanted (yes, really) for me to do one. All I could think of was you, all I wanted to talk about was you and I just couldn’t. God I wish I could go back and tell everyone how much I wanted you there, how my happiness was lessened, how the day was less without you. 

I kind of feel mad at you as I’m writing this, I haven’t felt that way toward you since it all happened. I really needed you, so badly wanted the world to be different and for you to have been there. 

I love you so much.


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